It's Just A Lullaby
by singsongyylove
Summary: Hush now, don't cry, it's just a lullaby- I won't leave you 'til you close your eyes. Pain in the Heart postep, B


Oh. My. Gosh. I havn't posted a story in like, a thousand years. I don't know, I've just been super busy. There's no simple explanation for it. Life. Anways, I've been looking for an excuse to write a story with this song (Hush Now by Catherine Feeny) because I just **love** it and it just seemed to explain B&B so perfectly, so when I saw Pain in the Heart I just went OH MY GOSH THERE IT IS. So, yes, I've spent since then on this story. But I didn't want to screw it up. So, yes. Finally.

Title: It's Just A Lullaby  
Author: Sara (singsongyylove)  
Rating: K --Unlike most of my stories, it's just so surprisingly void of offensive language that I can barely stand it.  
Spoilers: Pain in the Heart  
Summary: Booth and Brennan take a step forward when he finds her crying on his couch.  
Disclaimer: I know that you're really surprised to learn that I don't own Bones. Equally, I don't own the song Hush Now. Yeah, I was surprised to discover it as well.

* * *

Booth started loving his partner two and a half days after they first met. He could remember the exact moment. He had asked a question. A stupid question. She turned her head to look at him, annoyed with his lack of knowledge. But something sparkling beneath the surface of her eyes said it all. _I can teach all you need to know about anatomy, but I'll teach you so much more than that._ A glimmer of hope in being able to teach someone something that was important to her. Since then he'd memorized the names of all the bones in the body, but more than that, he'd found out what it was like to have someone who you simply could not hide from.

She was damaged, that was for sure. It seemed like over and over again, the people in her life had let her down, crossed her out. Booth looked into his partner's eyes and he could see she feared the same from each person to whom she allowed herself to open up. He didn't want to let her down, leave her alone, or allow her to be hurt. However, Brennan allowed herself any opportunity to remind him that she didn't need anyone to protect her. He loved that she was independent, but he never wanted her in harm's way. She didn't deserve anymore hurt. She was too good.

_I won't bury you in the basement  
As I've been known to do  
I won't bludgeon your memory  
Leave you crying out for truth _

They were a perfect team; that much was evident to anyone. Sweets had said so the best, they complemented each other. Where Brennan lacked, Booth excelled. Where Booth dropped the rope, Brennan was always there to pick up the slack. But somewhere along the way, they became more than the best crime-fighting duo that the FBI had. More than just partners. Dinner at the diner wasn't for fighting hunger; rather, it was the ritual of friends.

_There's a song we sing together  
The song of me and you  
And I was hoping that we could fix it  
At least just fiddle around with the tune_

The fact of the matter was that he had been denying it all along. Denying all of it. _No, I don't notice when you're wearing something particularly… enticing. No, I didn't feel anything when we kissed. No, I'm not protective of you for any other reason than the simple fact that you are my partner. _That was his biggest of all: _No, we're just partners. Nothing more._ It seemed that they'd been dancing around the issue of their friendship.

_But you go right, I go left  
You go forward, I go back  
And we're dancing this waltz alone_

It seemed like every once in a while they got a step closer to realizing that they had become closer than partners should be. Once in a while, their faces leaned so close to each other, and hearts beat so perfectly together that someone might have thought that something would happen. Someone might have thought that it was the moment when they'd cross the line. But she would pull back, he would avert his eyes. It was all so childish, this game of hide and seek.

_You go up, I go down, lost our grip  
And now we've found ourselves  
Dancing this waltz alone _

So when he arrived home after a whirlwind day, the Gormagon case finally closed for good, he thought he knew her well enough to know the reason she was sitting on the couch in his apartment. Zach's letter he had shown her earlier had not been enough to convince her that she had done something good for the boy. Booth frowned as his partner hiccupped with her head in her hands. Sliding next to her, he wrapped her up in his arms.

"Shhh, Zack's going to be fine," he said gently, even though he knew it was a lie.

"It's not Zack," she whimpered.

"What is it, Bones?" he prodded, her glazed eyes fighting a war within. All he could do was wait patiently as a tear rolled lazily down her cheek.

"You were dead, Booth," she admitted, "for two weeks it was impossible for me to accept that you were really dead. Now I turn around and I can't convince myself of the opposite."

"I'm alive. I'm right here," he held her close to his chest, willing her to understand that he was there for her, that she could tell him anything.

_Hush now, don't cry  
It's just a lullaby  
I won't leave you  
'Til you close your eyes_

After a few minutes of waiting, Booth heard her tiny voice as her head remained buried in his shirt, "I'm sorry that I trashed your closet."

"That was you??" he said incredulously, "And I suppose you're also the one who stole my rainbow striped socks, huh?" the man thought back to the first time he came into his apartment after coming back to life. His sock drawer sat open, churned over several times. The floor of his closet had been covered in his shirts and ties, as though someone had ripped them all off of the hangers in a rage. On his dresser, the framed picture of the two partners was smudged all over with fingerprints, as though someone was wiping something away. It made sense now. Bones had been there.

_Hush now, don't cry  
It's just a lullaby  
__I'll tell you sweet lies  
I won't leave your side _

"This was the only place where I was safe from everybody always asking me if I was okay. It was only me here. I could cry or be angry. Everyone thought I could compartmentalize it, but how can I compartmentalize the death of someone whose lines were blurred? When it's both professional and personal," Brennan swallowed deeply, "there's nothing to compartmentalize. There's not one place that didn't remind me of you."

"I'm so sorry, Temperance. You know I would have told you, had I known," he said firmly, cupping her cheeks to force her to look at him.

"I know," she mouthed, captivated by the depth of his coffee-colored eyes, "I just… I can't believe you're alive," he surrounded her with another hug, feeling her shake and her hands fist around his shirt as though she might just fall off the earth if she let go. Booth rubbed her back, continually reminding her that she didn't have to believe, he was there. The two remained curled together on the couch, unmoving, seeming to live off of each other's heat.

_Hush now, don't cry  
It's just a lullaby  
I won't leave you  
Til you close your eyes_

A fear suddenly gripped her. Brennan tugged at his shirt and looked up back into his eyes. "Please, don't leave me."

"You're fine, Bones. You can spend the night here."

"No, not just tonight," as she corrected him, their eyes made that connection where neither of them could look away; they couldn't even if they wanted to.

"Not tonight, not ever. I won't leave you again, Bones. I promise," and with his promise, Seeley Booth held her close, the one woman who he would give up anything for. He rocked her back and forth, shushing her, waiting for the sobs to dissipate and give way to sleep. Just like he promised, he wanted to always be there. He wanted to always be the one who made her tears disappear and held her until her eyes closed.

_Hush now, don't cry  
It's just a lullaby  
I'll tell you sweet lies  
I won't leave your side_

When her breathing finally became deep, he carried her to lie in his bed, and kissing her on the forehead, solidified his promise once again, "I'll never leave you, Bones. Not ever."


End file.
